My mother is 85 and just re-wrote her will herself. It is really a trust. To me it seems to be full of loopholes and unclear statements. Verbally, she has told all 4 of her children for MANY years that everything is to be divided equally when she dies, so that has been well-understood by all. She doesn’t want to take this to a lawyer because she thinks she can do this herself. She wants to keep it out of probate.
1.) She’s not thinking as clearly as she used to, but she’s not incompetent. Some paranoia. Seems to be very dependent upon a live-in brother, age 55, who takes minimal care of her (cooks, takes out garbage, mows)
2.) Our brother is 55 and living with her…has been living there for 20 years. He doesn’t work, lives an adolescent-type lifestyle of staying up until 3 a.m. and sleeping until noon. It is a complicated relationship, but basically is a co-dependent dysfunctional one in which she needs him so enables him, and he needs her and accepts. She pays him to run her errands, take her to the doctor, clean her house, etc.
3.) Due to instability of this brother and past observations of odd behavioral tendencies, we (the other 3 siblings) really don’t trust him too much.
4.) He has a legal background and has encouraged her to rewrite the will. The role of the executor has been eliminated and each of the 4 children have been given roles. 1 is to be treasurer, 1 handle appraisals, 1 (the live-in) handle ALL LEGAL WORK, 1 keep all the records and keep the peace among the siblings
5.) This has raised several red flags for me. She’s not thinking as clearly. She has not had an impartial lawyer look at it. I think there are a lot of assumptions being made…# 1 that everyone will be trustworthy and honorable in all proceedings.
I also think she has set us up for a big family feud. The live-in brother keeps telling her it is a good document and she doesn’t need a lawyer. I can’t help but to be concerned that he has something up his sleeve. He is and will be the most desperate of the siblings for money. He has high debts, has never held a good job, and I’m afraid he might do something desperate to get more than his fair share of the inheritance.
Question: I don’t want to appear greedy or mailcious, but is there anything we can do?
She has signed it and it is legal now from what she says, but no one has a signed copy but the live-in brother. She is now (after the fact) asking for input. I wanted to suggest a statement saying that any services provided by the live-in brother have been in exchange for room, board and any care he has provided for the past 20 years. My only thought is that he might try to charge her estate for taking care of her for the last 20 years, which he has not. He has only cared for her for about a year or two .
Question: What are our options with a trust?
1. A will requires two witnesses and other formalities. You need to get a copy of the will and have an estate planning attorney review the document and the circumstances of execution.
2. A trust is a more complicated document than a will. Assets need to be transferred into the trust before the trust becomes effective as to those assets. It is very helpful as it avoids probate proceedings which is much more expensive than the legal fees for a trust.
3. Your brother appears to be exercising undue influence upon your mother. She needs to see an estate planning attorney to get all of the details straight. Estate planning is not a simple area of the law. You mother is risking a great deal of conflict among the children should she pass with a poorly drafted document or one subject to being declared void because your brother exercised undue influence upon her.
I would happy to help. I do not charge for my initial consultation.